On the Cusp

August 20, 2011April 15, 2014 by nance In Writing 5 Comments

It’s definitely happening, folks. My little guy is on the cusp. When it happened with Gryffin I didn’t realize what was going on right in front of me. Didn’t realize the significance of what was happening. But now it’s Isaiah’s turn and I’m very much aware that he’s teetering on the brink. He’s about to leave babyhood behind and wobble his way into the wonderful world of toddler life. It happens so gradually that you don’t really notice at first. It’s like watching a flower open. The changes are so subtle, so delicate, almost impossible to detect. But yet it opens right in front of you and you aren’t even sure when exactly it went from bud to bloom.

I remember someone asking me about Gryffin when he was about 16 months, “how does it feel to not have a baby anymore?” and I just stared at them blankly. The thought had never occurred to me. Not a baby? Of course he was still a baby! But over the next several days it started to dawn on me that he wasn’t. How could this be? When did it happen? My friend was right. I began to think back, trying to remember everything from the past year. And I was surprised at how much I had already forgotten. So now I know how very fickle the human mind is, how quickly a parent forgets all the little details of babyhood as their children grow and change with each passing day. Jason and I immediately began to lament the fact that we were already starting to forget some of the sweet little details of Gryffin’s babyhood. And now Isaiah’s as well.

From the moment we came home from the hospital we have called Isaiah “Baby.” It started with Gryffin, of course. At just 18 months, there was no hope that he could pronounce Isaiah. So it’s been “Baby” since day 1. It still is. But we are so very near the end of this era in his life. As much as I long for each milestone and cheer on every tottering step he takes, I can’t help but miss my dear “Baby” already.

So goodbye to my dozy dinosaur. You slept more than any baby I’ve ever seen in your first few months of life.